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Just Call Me Jess

Mood Disorders and Mindfulness

March 7, 2019

8 Tips On How To Leave Work At Work

No matter what we all do professionally, we must all make a habit and know how to leave work at work, these 8 tips can help!

I know I am not the only one that has made the terrible mistake of bringing my work frustrations home and lashing out of everyone in sight.

Irritability, stress, anger, anxiety and tiredness all weigh heavily on us when we do not correctly de-compress from work. The purpose of the post is to learn how to empty your cup before you leave work.

What happens when you do not leave work at work?

Mindfulness is your ability to take time and listen to your body and mind and be in that present moment.

When you practice mindfulness you are more likely to think before you react in stressful situations, more likely to foster positivity in the future and be attuned to your body’s needs.

When mindfulness is practiced successfully, one should be able to focus better and not be afraid of stress because they now know how to cope with it.

There are different ways you can practice mindfulness, one of my favorites is to stay in the car a little longer when you arrive home. Sit in silence in your car, shut your eyes and be in the moment.

Relax your shoulders, breath (I recommend Insight Timer app) and think about how the negativity will stay outsides as you walk inside your home.

When one does not practice mindfulness they are more likely to create tension and negativity into the home environment thereby causing turmoil within the family.

It is dangerous when the home environment becomes negative because one is unable to fully relax and listen to what the body needs. If work is taken home and the lines become blurred between personal and professional life, burnout and exhaustion will result.

Isolation, anxiousness, anger, and nervousness are also a result of consistently taking work or work related stress home. When you do not practice separating work from home you will increase your likelihood of physical, mental and emotional illness.

Now that you know why it is important to separate home and work life, let me help out with information that will help you form this good habit.

8 tips on how to leave work at work words with desk in background

8 Tips for leaving work at work:

Stay In The Car

I spoke of this above, but to reiterate: give yourself a moment to see where you are and what you need. Finish listening to the song on the radio or turn it off and sit in silence.

Be realistic! Is there any way you can resolve your issue tonight? Will it stress you out or create anxiety if you continue to think of it?

At minimum do not let your job/career have space in your mind and time that they are not paying for.

Speak About What Happened At Work, At Work

Especially within my field, it is incredibly important to “staff” or speak with a supervisor about how a client or your day has gone. Speaking with co-workers could also help alleviate stress through a quick vent session.

Remain Silent

There is nothing wrong with informing our family that you had a rough day at work and need a few extra moments to gather yourself. This fore-warns everyone that you are not ready to hear bad news, what needs to be done or anything stressful at the moment.

I believe it is a good idea in general to make it a habit to allow yourself to change into comfortable clothing or shower before bombarding yourself with responsibilities.

Take A Shower

While in the shower assess where you are. Do you need to think about what happened at work one last time? This is your chance to do it. Be okay with not finding the answer to your stress. Instead of worrying about what you can do tomorrow live out today (or tonight in this case). 

Workout

One of the best ways to blow off some steam (aka stress) is to burn energy! Its a two in one activity: you get to focus your mind elsewhere while getting healthy.

Physical exercise has many benefits for your mental: reducing stress, increasing concentration, increasing endorphins being released by the brain (endorphins take pain away and increase ability to sleep aka relax).

Read, Write Or Draw

Often used in therapy, forms of art can be extremely beneficial to your mental health. [Get Art Therapy ideas here].

Reading will allow your mind to travel elsewhere and live within another world where your problems do not matter or do not exist.

Writing will allow you to vent within a journal and organize your thoughts. Drawing distracts you and allows you to turn your brain off and allow your hands to move effortlessly. 

Speak To Your Spouse

Sometimes your spouse can allow you to see your situation in a different light. They may also be able to give advice and guidance for how to resolve the issue.

If nothing else, your spouse may be able to alleviate some of your stress, by helping with your responsibilities at home or allowing you a moment to yourself before informing you of any new information. 

Know When To Get Help

At times the continuous thoughts of work and “never being off” will wear on your mind and body. Some people fall into depression, have increased anxiety, reduced ability to get adequate sleep and may increase irritability.

When one begins to notice depressive symptoms or any of the other symptoms listed it may be time to take a mental health day or may constitute seeing your doctor.

You could also use these tips to help you get over the fear of going to therapy!

Know Your Triggers And WArning Signs

Lastly be sure to know your triggers and warning signs. When I am bringing my work home, my husband will tell me “you must have had a rough day” and I immediately know that I have an attitude, wearing my day inside the home, or creating tension.

Physically, I will get a migraine or will not be able to sleep due to work related stress. I began to investigate why and noticed that I frequently took home work. I would take my laptop home to finish client notes and ensure documents were imported in time.

I would think about something a client told me and wonder if I responded correctly to it (and more than likely I would stay up researching it. I had to learn that I was no good at work or home by blending the two.

The most important thing to remember out of all the information above is to take care of yourself. We have all heard it before “your job will replace you within a week”.

Do you really want to stress yourself out, stress your family or be on constant edge for a job that can survive with or without you?

I always encourage individuals to take a sick day and just relax with some take out. No responsibilities and no need to plan to do anything just BE.

As always I am here to help!

Filed in: Mental Health • by justjess18 • 66 Comments

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Comments

  1. Cristina Coroiu

    March 8, 2019 at 3:15 am

    Damn…you spoke to my soul. I have to work on this. Whenever I have a bad day at work I’m super cranky and take it out on my husband. And when I have a tiresome day at work, I become a yes or no conversation partner. I really have to work on leaving work at work.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 8, 2019 at 12:13 pm

      Use some of the tips and see if they help 😁

      Reply
    • tenzendude

      March 15, 2019 at 2:20 pm

      Without fail, when I pick up my wife from her work each night she vents about her day. I dont need to respond or give advice. She isnt looking for me to do that. I am just there to facilitate. I dont absorb any of it. After a few minutes she is her old self again. It just works for us. 😊

      Reply
  2. georginawangui

    March 8, 2019 at 4:58 am

    The last point on knowing your triggers is very important. If you don’t know your triggers, then you will not know what to avoid in order to reduce your stress levels.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 8, 2019 at 12:13 pm

      That is exactly true

      Reply
  3. crisshex88

    March 8, 2019 at 10:15 am

    When I worked in the office it was something I was doing to try to get away from my mind, in moments of greater stress and then find the concentration better than before.

    Reply
  4. thewayfaringredhead

    March 8, 2019 at 3:40 pm

    I work what I consider a higher stress job in an ER and when I have a bad shift it is very hard to always leave this at work. This is a very important thing to be aware of . Thanks for the wonderful ideas.

    Reply
  5. Tara Pittman (@momknowsbest15)

    March 8, 2019 at 6:23 pm

    I like to workout after work. It is a great way to clear my head of work stuff.

    Reply
  6. cvshamnas

    March 8, 2019 at 10:18 pm

    This is difficult for me since I work from home. But I go for a long walk with my family after work hours for a refreshment.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 9, 2019 at 6:27 pm

      That’s a great habit to keep

      Reply
  7. Deola

    March 8, 2019 at 11:19 pm

    This is a very timely post. I am working more on being fully present at every moment in my life and not carrying the frustrations of one area over to the other.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 9, 2019 at 6:27 pm

      That’s awesome that you’re working on this

      Reply
  8. Alexithymia_Shubhi

    March 9, 2019 at 2:13 pm

    I completely agree with your points. Some of my family members bring work at home and are always picking up office calls which is quite annoying for others. It is always better to discuss work at work place and manage other places accordingly. You have written nicely to remind all other readers. Great post 🙂

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 9, 2019 at 6:27 pm

      Thank you

      Reply
  9. lauraslife123

    March 9, 2019 at 4:01 pm

    Great post. Something I thing we all need to do better x

    Reply
  10. aisasami

    March 9, 2019 at 6:10 pm

    Ahhhh, it is hard to leave work at work, especially in a country where I live that thinks life is all about work. I had to even work from home today and talk to my coworkers today via Line.

    Reply
  11. Christopher Mitchell

    March 9, 2019 at 9:22 pm

    In my line of work, (travel blogging and so forth), I find it so hard to not ALWAYS be working, but it’s something that I really need to work on, and I’ve accepted that!

    Reply
  12. Krystle Cook

    March 10, 2019 at 7:10 pm

    Making sure to leave work stuff behind is so important. There is nothing worse than bringing all of that into home and family time.

    Reply
  13. momi berlin

    March 11, 2019 at 2:11 am

    I agree. I am now a stay at home mom and when i was still working, I often leave everything at the office what needs to be left there. I feel more peace of mind and i could concentrate more on my task as a mom and homemaker.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 11, 2019 at 11:07 am

      That’s awesome that you had 5hose boundaries in place!

      Reply
  14. Alexandra Cook

    March 11, 2019 at 5:10 am

    Stress can really get the best of me. Keeping it controlled is only going to be good for us!

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 11, 2019 at 11:07 am

      That’s true

      Reply
  15. Dalene Ekirapa

    March 11, 2019 at 1:22 pm

    Absolutely! It’s so bad when one brings all the troubles from work home. To ease that, I normally take a long shower once home.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:44 am

      I do the same!

      Reply
  16. Travel with Karla

    March 12, 2019 at 6:51 am

    I love all these tips! I actually work at home but I make sure that I have a specific work space. I keep my bedroom clean and free from work! Haha.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:44 am

      That’s awesome

      Reply
  17. happyandbusy

    March 12, 2019 at 9:11 am

    Work should really be left at the office. Do not mix it up with your personal life. If you are angry, do not carry it all the way to your home.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:44 am

      It’s easier said then done

      Reply
  18. Michael David Oyco

    March 12, 2019 at 9:23 pm

    I want to practice this badly but I am too passionate to the work I go into. =(

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:47 am

      That’s understandable. Take baby steps

      Reply
  19. mayarcenal

    March 13, 2019 at 3:20 am

    Hi there! thanks for sharing this. But do you have any tips also for those who work from home, like myself? Thank you ❤

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:48 am

      Have separate work spaces! When I was in school full time my office was designated for that work. After a certain time I took breaks, and was complete for the day.

      Reply
  20. detourswithoutcoffee

    March 13, 2019 at 3:25 am

    Thank you so much for writing this! So many people need to read this as so many people do not know how to balance their lives. I am proud to say that I literally just learned how to separate the business from the personal a few months ago. Thanks for the tips!

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:47 am

      Thanks for reading

      Reply
  21. Shirley Tharp

    March 13, 2019 at 6:40 am

    When I was teaching high school math, we always let students with drama going on in their lives draw, read, or doodle once their work was done. It seemed to help.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:49 am

      Classic art therapy 😁

      Reply
  22. Minda I Centsandfamily

    March 13, 2019 at 8:40 am

    Hi! What an important idea especially when coming home to my family. We need to clear our minds before coming home and to go ahead and be there 100% for them.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:49 am

      Exactly!

      Reply
  23. Surekha Busa

    March 13, 2019 at 10:01 am

    That was really a hard thing to do. But I always try to refresh my mind by watching my favorite music videos.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:50 am

      That’s a good practice

      Reply
  24. Sabrina Barbante (@SabrinaBarbante)

    March 13, 2019 at 2:15 pm

    These are very wise tips and words mainly for those who, like me, work from home many months a year. It’s so easy to mix up work stress and home life, it’s always so hard to fix burdens, mainly now that we are always “connected”

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:50 am

      Right! I can see how that could be challenging

      Reply
  25. vidyatiru

    March 13, 2019 at 4:57 pm

    All great tips indeed.. While I am not currently working, I know keeping work and home separate is necessary.. While it was tough since I did work from home often, I want to think I did manage it for the most part

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:51 am

      Having good habits in place will make life alot easier

      Reply
  26. melissa major

    March 14, 2019 at 6:27 am

    These are such helpful tips, thanks for sharing them. It’s hard sometimes to leave work at work sometimes, life can get so busy

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:52 am

      I understand. Hopefully next time these tips can stick and you can try them out

      Reply
  27. Elizabeth O

    March 14, 2019 at 7:09 am

    this is so important that we ought to leave our work tensions at our work place. thanks for sharing such important tips. stress make our life like hell so we should not bring our work load into our personal life.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 14, 2019 at 11:52 am

      Thank you for reading

      Reply
  28. Alex

    March 15, 2019 at 2:24 am

    This really spoke to me 🙌🏾 love this post

    Reply
  29. newmumfun6

    March 15, 2019 at 5:00 am

    Great tips, I will have to put these into practice as too often I find work annoyances upset me at home.

    Reply
  30. Song of the heart

    March 15, 2019 at 7:54 am

    A great post!!

    Reply
  31. Liz Bayardelle

    March 15, 2019 at 1:45 pm

    I love all of these tips, and on such an important subject! I’m a work at home mom and it’s even harder to leave work at work, because work happens to be at home. However, this doesn’t make it any less necessary! I especially like the parts about taking a long shower or working out. These are always my most effective tricks.

    Reply
  32. munniofalltrades

    March 15, 2019 at 5:59 pm

    I often struggle with work-life balance and when I am very stressed, I tend to snap at my family. It is important to find a balance and leave work at work.

    Reply
  33. Blairvillanueva

    March 17, 2019 at 9:50 am

    I’ve been to that toxic situation and learned to change it. Now I never bring work at home because I have to give my attention to my other work, and to my beloved. Less stress and more motivation to work.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 19, 2019 at 12:59 pm

      That’s awesome

      Reply
  34. Sauumye Chauhan

    March 17, 2019 at 3:51 pm

    I have has both types of job – one where you keep work at work and one where you carry work around with you. And I must say, I love the first type. It is so good to be at home and not worry about the work emails and all of that stuff.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 19, 2019 at 12:59 pm

      Definitely!

      Reply
  35. brianmayroam

    March 17, 2019 at 8:54 pm

    I like number 5 the most. Ideally, it would be perfect if everyone could exercise before work and after.

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 19, 2019 at 12:59 pm

      Ideally yes lol

      Reply
  36. Ronkerria's Post

    March 19, 2019 at 8:52 am

    I’m a strong advocate for leaving work at work lol. but this was a really great and informative blog post. I’m definitely going to use some of your tips mentioned!

    Reply
    • Jess

      March 19, 2019 at 12:59 pm

      Thanks for reading!!

      Reply
  37. Ale

    April 6, 2019 at 1:59 am

    it is super important to leave work at work and not bring it home, for your sanity and your family’s sanity

    Reply
    • Jess

      April 10, 2019 at 9:31 pm

      Exactly

      Reply
  38. Gratisoul

    November 18, 2019 at 7:20 am

    I really loved that staying in the car and long shower advice. It really helps and is a great way to practice mindfulness. Loved the blog!

    Reply
  39. Carolyn

    November 23, 2019 at 3:19 pm

    Wow, these are some AMAZING tips. I have a really hard time leaving work at work, so I’ll definitely implement some of these. Thanks!

    Reply

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  1. 8 Super Easy Self Care Strategies To Manage Stress - Just Call Me Jess says:
    July 8, 2020 at 6:04 am

    […] have an entire post dedicated to work related stress, you can find here, because so many people struggle with it. Including […]

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As a licensed social worker working in an adult community mental health center in the South, Jess seeks to spread awareness and educate those who may otherwise never gain mental health information.

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